Flower lessons
It was the first pot of flowers I bought.
I like flowers in nature, not much for those put in death for human pleasure though. Flowers are so delicate. For years, I’ve felt it was quite a responsibility to grow one, so I didn’t.
Until that day, an orchid on the shelf caught my eyes. It was so beautiful. At that time, I felt I was ready to take on it, along with many things I had been running away from in life.
It’s turned out, growing this orchid has taught me so much over the course of a few weeks.
#Day 2
While I don’t have the comparison, the orchid feels like a princess. She only drinks warm water! Preferably in the morning! And her leaves don’t like water, so you need to be careful with the angle of watering.
It was a totally new experience for me and I enjoyed it. Every day, I sat in front of the orchid, watched her, wondering when she would blossom.
Then I noticed some tiny holes in her leaves. After monitoring it for two more days and seeing the development, a bad feeling emerged. As a millennial mom, I turned to google for confirmation — those were bug bites.
Looking closely, I saw some white strings around the bottom. Following those strings, I found a spider living beneath the leaves.
I am scared of spiders.
It was not a good day to confront this fear. I was undergoing several events in life and compounded growing pain. For a moment, I thought about throwing the orchid away (or to make it sounds less terrible — leaving it on the street for someone else to adopt). It would be an instant problem solved. I once did it to the plants my mother brought to my place, sincerely thinking they would have a better future to live outside.
But I’ve told myself not to run away from problems. I brought the orchid home and committed to her. She couldn't kill the spider herself and had been suffering from it. I had to do it.
So I got two Qtips and tried to crush the spider. It escaped.
Now your enemy is hiding somewhere in the dark. It is worse. All I could do was poking around the soil (still with the Qtips) hoping to hit the spider by chance. But hoping is never a good strategy. After struggling to follow the homemade organic pesticide guide, I ordered an industrial one from Amazon.
I guess sometimes (most of the time) taking the courage does not mean success, you might well sign yourself up for more challenges and failures. But at least it is way better than giving up.
#Day 5
For the 25th time in a month, I woke up while it was still dark outside — 3:30 am this time.
A life event climbed up quite dramatically, when it was finally resolved around 8 am, I was drained, physically and mentally. Sitting on the floor and looking up, it was the time I saw the first blossom of the orchid.
I later posted:
“As if after going through all the challenges and obstacles, the hero was finally at the fringe of the success. Unexpectedly, he got his biggest hit ever.
Deep in the abyss, hopeless, he was blessed, fought to his last drop of blood, and defeated the monster.
In the ruins after the war, that flower which had been asleep, blossomed.
Both the hero and the monster
were me. ”
#Day 10
After the first one, the flowers opened one after another.
It amazed me how clearly the orchid seemed to know what she would become.
I have a bad habit of thinking/worrying a lot and trying to have everything under control. However, when it comes to the orchid, there is not much I can or need to do beyond watering her. The flower buds are well-proportioned so they don’t bump into each other. They follow their own pace and order, only one blossom at a time, starting from the side closed to the main branch. When buds crowded towards the end, which got me a little nervous, one of them opened into a new angle — expanding the plant from 2 dimensions into 3 dimensions…
She knows exactly where to go and how to get there. She has gotten all those answers within her since she was still a seed.
All I do is to provide a good environment for her to realize her potential.
#Day 20
Taking care of the orchid and watching her grow delights me every day. Compared to the little effort I put in, which itself was already rewarding, she gave me so much more: vitality, beauty, contentment, enlightenment, the list goes on.
The orchid has fully blossomed. The last two flower buds sprouted then shrunk, probably sensing the gravity pull with her prosperity and weight.
Pondering on my last lesson, I lifted up her branch with a string, so that she might feel more room to grow.
I want to see how far she can go.
